Growing a Thick Skin or Retaining our Sensitivity
Were you too asked by someone to grow a thick skin when you shared your feelings with them in a certain challenging situation?
A common statement floating around in our society is – ‘grow a thick skin‘. And then examples are given of someone who is successful, well according to them & is completed by a typical ending – ‘see, they just don’t care‘; do you see how successful they are!’
How sad it is that we are asking each other to grow a thick skin. As if our already existing insensitivity towards each other wasn’t enough.
Now these people don’t mean harm, but they don’t have the capacity to think beyond a point of comfort. Or the ability to look at the long-term impact they are causing on the planet.
This phrase “grow a thick skin” is often used as an advice to someone who is easily affected or offended. Now this means that the person should become more resilient towards criticism, negative feedback, or insults. Growing a thick skin is not about becoming insensitive, shutting yourself up or disregarding the feelings of others. It’s about developing a healthy sense of self-worth and resilience so that you can navigate through life’s challenges with confidence, grace and compassion.
Guess it’s a poor choice of word, that got lost in transition.
A Full proof & Sustainable Approach–
Instead of bothering about that thick skin – (which won’t happen anyway, no matter how hard we try we will continue to be affected by others, we are humans first remember?) – train to build a resilient nervous system. Followed by knowing your own inherent nature & response system with Yoga postures, dhyana, practising Maitri(friendliness) & Karuna(compassion).
You are always operating from a particular response system unique to you.
Do you know it fully? Are you aware of it?
More than what will people say to you, if you look carefully then, you are worried about what is going to be your response towards that situation.
Whether you are going to be nervous, agitated, anxious, sad, or angry.
And then the real worry is how would you react to it?
Will you lose your cool?
Will succumb to the situation & then regret later?
Or will you be able to handle it with balance & poise?
Do you see? It is not their behaviour that’s troubling you, but the complete lack of self-certainty, and self-assurance is what you are worried about? This worry is planted deep in you. This disconnection of the self needs to be addressed first. Growing that thick skin is adding a band-aid to the real wound. It’s neither the cure nor the prevention.
Now, if you practice rebuilding your nervous system with the proper tools & perseverance(your own resolve through a Sankalp), it will not only help you step by step clear your perceptibility and enhance it, broadening your horizons, sharpening your focus. You are going to also retain your superpower.
Wait, did no one tell you that you have a superpower?
Your sensitivity, your humanity, your warmth. This beating heart, that only knows how to love is your superpower.
Imagine you remaining unaffected yet fully sensitive, & with your level of compassion what miracles you can create in the world. For those who need you.
We need people who are extremely sensitive towards others suffering. They feel every blow, they see every tear & they hear every cry for help. Yet they are focused & ever ready to be of service. They maintain their good health & well-being inside out and are joyful inside because they understand the value of self-sustenance to serve others. Before helping someone with their mask, help yourself first.
Why joyful? Because the fickle nature of the ego can be dissolved with childlike joy.
That’s the world we must aim for. Not growing a thick skin & getting more insensitive from the outside & even more broken on the inside. It does no good to anyone.
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To build resilience and understand your own nature & response system we have carefully put together a 90 days Self Healing, Self Learning & Self Paced Meditation Program with practice sessions, breathwork, lessons, journaling, stories & much more to help you step by step not just know yourself with deeper clarity, to also clear your deeper blocks & lead you towards a better daily life. One day at a time.
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